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Rantings and Ravings of a Semi-Narcissist
 
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Below are the 3 most recent journal entries recorded in lishaznia's LiveJournal:

Sunday, January 21st, 2007
2:00 am
Marriage...
Marriage - Part I

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:

"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night .....whether you're here or not."


(DAMN SHE'S GOOD!)

************************************

Marriage (Part II)

Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary!

The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that
reads:

"Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever "

"Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:


"Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last"

(HE ASKED FOR IT!)

******************************

Marriage (Part III)

Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house.

After some time, he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says, "What took you so long to answer the phone?"

She says, "I was in bed."

"In bed this early, doing what?"

"Getting a second opinion!"

(YEP, HE HAD THAT ONE COMING, TOO!)

******************************************

Marriage (Part IV)

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, "Mother of Six"
in spite of her objections.

One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home 'Mother of Six?'

His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion, shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."

(RIGHT ON, LADY!)

**************************************

Marriage (Part V) The Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 am for an early morning business flight.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 am" He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

**************************************

God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

Current Mood: lazy
Wednesday, November 29th, 2006
11:22 pm
What is up with ASIAN chicks?
I've just watched episode 9 of America's Next Top Model 7. There's another Asian chick but this time she's Indian. So yeah for sure I was rooting for a fellow Asian though I didn't really see what Tyra meant that she was SOO beautiful that it was scary and that she was too beautiful at times. Maybe I'm used to seeing pretty Indian girls back here in Malaysia that she's just borderline average to me. I seriously thought that the last Asian girl, Gina, was like any other chinese ah moi if she were to come to Ipoh. It's kinda weird seeing the judges raving on and on about her cheekbones and stuff when I see far prettier chinese girls at the wet market. But then again, Westerners have always been into the "Orient". It's a fascination towards the so-called "other", you know all that bullshit that anything that doesn't look and think like them is therefore weird. But I'm not gonna go into all that shit right now. I'll probably end up writing my thesis here.

What I wanna write about is the fact that these Asian girls, considered BEAUTIFUL by their white & black contemporaries just don't think of themselves as beautiful. Gina, the Korean, was chucked out after 3 episodes because she was so insecure about herself. And this Anchal girl was kicked out after the 7th episode for the exact same reason. I kinda knew she was gonna get chucked out sooner or later. Luckily it was a lot later than the Korean girl. I just don't get why she didn't think herself pretty. She considered herself fat and ugly. Yeah she was curvier than the other girls but HELLO! Asian women have always been curvy. And she wasn't fat at all.

I think those two girls are so brainwashed by the stereotype beauty of the West that they just don't realise their own uniqueness. I was so embarassed for the two girls that I was actually cringeing whenever I watched them humiliate themselves. But most of all I was disappointed that they gave up halfway. They claimed that they wanna model more than anything but they gave up when the going got tough. I mean what the hell?!! You don't give up. If you give up when you got that far might as well not enter at all. Sheesh!

I have a friend who's beautiful, confident and has a great personality to boot but she was rejected for a local reality show, Malaysia's Most Beautiful, just because she didn't conform to the stereotype beauty that Malaysian media wants. When somebody even halfway decent comes along they get rejected straight away. What's with that? I hate that girl who won Malaysia's Most beautiful. I think she's a bitch.

I just hope that one day there will be a contestant that would actually does Asian folks proud. I dont think I can go through another cringeworthy episode of an Asian chick making an ass of herself either on local Tv or an International one.

Current Mood: pensive
12:23 pm
Checking this place out
I'm just here for the heck of it. Thanks to a pal of mine I can't read her blogs if I'm not a member. Oh well... what the heck I have nothing else to do anyways. Downloading some episodes of America's Next Top Model season 7 so there's nothing much to do than wait it out. It's fun watching bimbo bitches fight it out on TV. I think all of their brains combined can't possibly equal to the capacity of a normal human brain.

I'm bored... but I dont want to go back to uni either. I just wanna stay HOME!!

Current Mood: blah
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